My mother was obsessed with her lawn.  Autumn was a challenge that was bigger than her.  She had all her trees cut down.  But, her neighbors had lots and lots of trees and lots and lots of leaves.  She raked and raked piles of colorful leaves.  It is not that the wind was blowing, it is what the wind was blowing.  She raked these onto a sheet and dragged it down onto the beach to dump them.  Then she set them on fire.

One day later, and her yard was once again covered in leaves.  She raked them, and she burned them on the beach.  All through fall she repeatedly did this.

We packed the kids into the car and went up north to help my mom. Once unpacked my mother greeted my husband with a ladder and a chainsaw.  “Take that big limb down.  It is hanging over my lot line.”  I told her that it was not her tree, and that trimming it was not a kosher activity.

My husband climbed the ladder onto the roof of the garage.  My mother climbed up there as well.  She then had vertigo from her basic fear of heights.  I went up there and talked and walked her down the ladder to solid ground.  We were all a bit intimidated by the chainsaw.  The neighbor’s whose tree we were trimming were not there.  My husband started up the chainsaw with a roar.  He cut down the limb, and then we had a mess on our hands.

The limb hit the garage roof, removing some of its shingles.  It also nearly missed my husband, causing him to lose his balance and nearly fall off the garage.  It rolled off the roof, and scattered twigs and leaves The big branch landed with a heavy thud near my mother. Our kids ran into the house screaming.

My husband and I took the rest of the day to clean up the mess.  The tree looked like it was missing an arm.  The neighbors would definitely notice. Despite all of this, the wind still blew the neighbors’ leaves onto my mother’s lawn.

After we left she called a fencing company that installed a “spite” fence ten feet tall along the lot line.  They saw the damage to the roof and she put a brand new roof on her garage and house.  Cost was not a consideration.  She had fewer leaves to rake, to be sure.

When the neighbors came back up north to their second home they saw the branch that was missing, and also, could not help noticing the spite fence. They did not speak to my mother again.  But, that was okay because my mother liked being alone.