You have to have heard this: “If you cannot say something nice don’t say anything at all.” My mother told me this when I was six years old. Then she said it oftener as I grew older. She is no longer with me to admonish me when I behave badly. But that saying stayed with me and it is as relevant now as it was when I was six. All of us have had a rough time over the last two years. I cannot complain. All of our four children are healthy and happy for now. They love us and actually care for each other. I try to guide them when they stray from nice to nasty. I try to model good behavior for them. They do the same when I go off the launch pad over this and that at times.

We have roofs over our heads, clothes to wear, food to eat, and each other to count upon. Many people do not have one or more of these things. My husband does the grocery shopping and always has a tale to tell when he comes home. “You won’t believe this,” he says. He often encounters grocery cart hostility, parking lot peevishness, and literal food fights. He often brings out menopausal madness in the aisles, just for being male. He is disliked because he wears a mask even though we now have three vaccines each. Our growing family is not getting together over this year’s holidays. We have a new grandchild. She’s not vaccinated. We love her so much. With Facetime and Skype, we see her every day and she sees us. She smiles and gets excited.

I am tired of being cooped up like a hen in a henhouse. I need a heavier winter coat so I can walk a tenth of a mile and back home. I pulled a muscle in my hamstring and walking is dicey. This happened about six weeks ago and I am still limping. I am so proud of myself if I manage to put a load in the laundry. I still complain in my brain until my mother’s advice comes back to me.

A minuscule virus has rendered us helpless and for some, hopeless. How can something so tiny cause such huge repercussions in our lives, global and local. Now more than ever being nice is harder. More of us are sick, angry, and tired. Our lives are not the same as they were before the virus spread. I smile with my eyes and people can see the smile even though I am masked. If someone is losing their temper over some minor thing, I give them a healthy social distance. No one knows what the other experiencing in this pandemic. I have good days and bad. I am trying to feel holiday cheer and it is harder this year. Being nice, however, costs nothing. It might just give someone a split second of feeling that all is well in the world.